I hate when white people start talking to me about their tans because at that point I have to do everything in my power to avoid the obligatory putting of their arm next to mine and saying they’re almost as “tan” as me

(via surprises)

Kidnapper: Get in the fukin van

Me: Oh ok cool

Kidnapper: Wut

Me: This is a febreze commercial right

Kidnapper: Wut

Me: Smells pretty shitty in here to me tbh


do you ever get attached to like one line or phrase from a song and it holds so much meaning to you but no one else understands how powerful those few words are to you

(via turn-upthe-music)

Straight White Boy Problem #450


bro: hey dude isnt tumblr for girls?? why do you even have one

me: i had a lot of free time and then i discovered the joy of reblogging pictures of massive amounts of weed, trippy gifs, nike apparel from the 90s and the occasional chuckle i get out of a humor post haha

bro: thats too complicated for me *opens ifunny app*

(via surprises)